Shyness Treatment Options

Most of the emails we get sent usually end in asking us about shyness treatment and what options are available. I’ll start this by saying I’m 100% biased here. I’ll do my best to give as much information as possible but not only do I run an online course but I beat shyness myself through an online course and honestly I think it’s the best way. Everyone is going to beat this at a difference pace and a lot of “treatment” options really just make you think you’re doing something when the reality is you’re getting your happy feel goods for a half hour because you think you’re finally doing something about it. But the next social situation you encounter you’ll slink right back.

Maybe I’m old fashioned but I have a thing for treatment options which actually, you know… do something.

So when it comes to treating shyness what are your options?

Online Shyness Training

shyness groupPretty self explanatory really. It’s training for shyness. And it’s online.

I’m assuming you’re here because someone sent you the link or you’ve been searching around on overcoming shyness and social anxiety. Which is a good start. It’s becoming the go to for people suffering from shyness because they don’t have to talk to anyone about it.

The problem is there’s a lot of bad advice on shyness around. Especially on the internet.

Normally bad advice is just bad advice and it can be obvious and won’t really do any harm. But bad advice on the internet masquerades as common sense and can look like it makes sense sometimes. But rather than just getting nothing done it can make things worse. It can reinforce your shyness and make things worse.

So be careful with whatever advice you choose to follow.

The other problem with just reading some articles online and hoping it’ll show you how to get over shyness fast is that you’ll likely remember from time to time but it won’t be consistent. A training course (like the one we run) keeps you working on it day after day making steady progress. It keeps you on track, it keeps you doing the right thing and it’s how originally overcame my own shyness.

Shyness and Social Anxiety Support Group

I’m not sure if it’s just me who finds the idea of this a little strange but I’ve actually seen a few of these popping up over the last year or so. We all know what a support group is, right? A group of people going through the same thing who meet up and help each other through it. Now I’m pretty used to coaching people through their shyness online over email, video and the odd seminar online at times.

But I have to admit I’ve never been to one of these.

The idea of actually having a meeting of strangers to help people who had an issue meeting strangers… seemed a little daft to me I’ll be honest. I’d suggested it in the past when I was coaching people who lived nearby and I was pretty quickly shot down (at least during the early stages).

But then after the second group in my city popped up I started looking into it and I found this Toronto based shyness group seems to have been the driving force. Now I’m a fan of this kind of website which can introduce you to new people and things but the first time I’d seen the group I was skeptical.

I’ve also noticed a trend on Meetup (especially with people suffering from shyness) to RSVP yes to an event and then not show. So I went along to some of the local ones in my city and was surprised to see people showing up.

Now as some of you know I invite real shyness stories on the site and I’ve invited some of the people I met there to share their stories so you might see them pop up here at some point. But from what I gathered it was really helping people.

I’d imagine at the very least it’s meeting people who go through the same kind of problems so you won’t get the usual “just get over it” nonsense. If you think it helps you then I’d say go for it. Don’t settle for nonsense advice and don’t go once or twice a year and think that’ll do the trick.

From what I gather it helps people. And I can’t think of any other yardstick to gauge something like this by and I’ve a lot of respect for the guys who put it together.

I recently did a post on dealing with loneliness and this would be a great chance to get some social exposure, and meet new people at the same time as maybe getting some techniques and advice.

I would say if you feel comfortable meeting a group like this you’ve got nothing to lose. Take a look on Meetup to see if there’s a group in your area (or consider starting one) and you might get a lot out of it. If you don’t feel up to it then I wouldn’t say it’s the biggest deal and you can certainly learn to overcome your shyness without a meeting like this.

I don’t think it’ll replace learning the techniques needed to improve yourself and overcome your shyness by book or online (it’s just the nature of the beast) but it’s a handy little tool to have in the belt and worth checking around to see if your city has one.

Shyness Forums

Oh dear. People think I like these because it combines the benefits from a shyness anxiety group with online training. Right?

Wrong. Oh dear me wrong.

I’ve already had my rant on shyness forums in the past so I really won’t go into it again but I don’t think they serve much benefit. It’s why we don’t host one here.

Hypnosis for Shyness

I’m not even going to start on this. Please don’t make me.

I have no problem with what people want to believe when it comes to holistic medicine etc… And if you want to use some hypnosis as part of a “throw the kitchen sink at it” then go right ahead. But please don’t stick on an MP3 once in a while and think that’s going to cure your shyness. It juts doesn’t work like that.

Medication for Shyness

This again we’ve already covered in detail elsewhere. It’s not the answer you’re going to be looking for but the cliff notes are: don’t bother. Things like depression and anxiety yes, 100% can and sometimes should be treated with medication but shyness is just not the same. It’s a learned behavior that you just need to unlearn. I know that makes it sounds easier than it is but medication is not the answer. It’s wishful thinking logic and looking for a quick way for a short term answer.

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