What To Do When Feeling Lonely

Our complete what to do when feeling lonely guide. You only get one life stop wasting it away with shyness. Get a markable difference in your social life and overcome shyness within 7 days. How crazy is that?

If you’re reading this, chances are you know what it’s like to feel lonely. That means you know that loneliness can sometimes feel like it’ll never end, and that you can often be surrounded by friends and family and still feel cut off from the world. But loneliness isn’t something that you have to manage on your own, and though it might be hard, there are things you can do to feel more connected to people around you.

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uses to give you the best experience. Here are a few of the main study that came out last year showed that 82% of Australians think loneliness is getting more and more just because youre feeling lonely, it doesnt mean that you are different or weird: in fact, it means that you have more in common with the people around you than you loneliness can be a symptom of something else going on in our lives, like illness or disability. Sometimes you might not even feel lonely for an obvious reason, and what youre experiencing could always be connected to other things like or it’s true that a lot of people tend to feel lonely during big life events. Or you just feel like youve outgrown your friendship group, or that theyre starting to get into things that dont really interest of these things could be making you feel lonely and lost, and you might find it hard to connect with people around no one single way to fight loneliness: if there was, everybody would be using it!

what to do when feeling lonely


The Loneliness Quiz

Instead of waiting until you get lonely, Lisa Bahar, a licensed marriage and family therapist, recommended that you make a list ahead of time for things that you can do. She told me, “The first step is to make a list before you get lonely, since it is highly unlikely the inspiration will come when you are lonely.” Her suggestions included activities, ways to contribute to others, and things that will make you feel better emotionally.

For the activities, she suggested, “Puzzles, running, biking, swimming, going on a whale watching trip, museum event, or a bus trip for a day to a location.” For contributing, she suggested that you “make a list of ways you can contribute. They don’t have to be big, perhaps walking a neighbor’s dog, offering to help an elderly person that is lonely in some way, or saying hello to the grocery checker. The goal is to get you out of your mind.”

Finally, to lift your emotions, Bahar recommended, “Listen to music that is fulfilling and has a spiritual sense to it, something that stirs a connection to emotions and life.” She said to keep going down the list until you figure out what works.

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Shynessoften do you feel lonely?. Know that others are out there feeling the same lonely feeling, so send light to all out there that suffering from this same feeling. They’ll get you out of the house and ease your feelings of told me, “Sign up for a class any class. Therefore, doing something to help us feel connected is often the gets lonely sometimes, but if you find yourself getting lonely on a consistent basis it be time to seek outside help. Do some of the activities suggested by the experts join a class, do something creative, move your body, or phone a friend.

what happens when you’re lonely you know when you have this true feeling of aloneness despite being all connected as we are these days where there’s social media everywhere we can follow all your friends or all your family or all the strangers of celebrities of the world where you can keep connected to everything but you’re not feeling connected where you feel truly apart from the world or apart from others or you’re in a place where you just feel so separate or you feel depressed and truly alone you feel and since loneliness in your life it’s a big topic today because I think a lot of people feel more of it than they’ve probably ever felt before partially because so much of what they’re seeing and connecting with online isn’t real or it’s trumped up as the best perfect rendition of someone’s life and your thing like what my life isn’t that good or you see all these shows on television where there’s you know there’s these friends and they have all these other friends and there’s always that you adventure and amazingness and you think wow the whole world must be full of extroverts who have 50 different friends and are dating 12 different people every single you know month that’s just not real and so we have these unreal expectations about our social world as well and and sometimes it can make us feel even more alone so what do you do when you’re feeling alone or you feel a heavy sense of loneliness I think it’s a serious topic so I won’t make too many jokes as I usually do in a lot of my shows you know this one is really about a genuine expression of because I’ve been there too I remember when I was younger when my teenage years I had broken up with my high school sweetheart I thought this was the person I was going to marry and our relationship fell apart and if you already talked about it I fell apart with it I became very alone very sad very depressed and I ultimately became suicidal because of it and I don’t know if you ever been there known someone who’s been there but if you have or you’ve been with someone who has phone into depression it’s a serious topic and it’s a topic that requires some clinical support it needs a therapist it needs somebody to talk through with it needs a counselor it needs a confidant because sometimes it’s just too hard on your own to deal with that so if you’re at that level of heavy where your loneliness or lowness or separateness makes you feel really depressed or very detached where it’s taken away from your data do a connection or joy with life itself please seek help because that’s a serious topic at a casual level I can share some ideas that helped me and that’s all I can really do you know I don’t pretend to be a clinician I don’t pretend to be one on the internet and I just think that it’s really important that we all find our own ways of connecting I think the first way is if you do have family if you do have friends if you do interact with the grocer or the taxi cab ride or the person who’s you know selling you a book at the bookstore these are all moments of with you have with humans that it’s time to up your level of engagement and satisfaction with the interactions you do have you know some people say they’re lonely and they’re not truly alone they do interact with people throughout the day but at an internal sense because they’re not drawing satisfaction from those interactions that they never feel connected so I make sense and so the job are all of our job is any human interactions we have to amplify our presence in that moment to be with the people that we are with not detached in our own fears or own worries or own insecurities but to just boom get there and get interested in other people see our fear when we’re lonely is that no one’s gonna be interested in us and we’ll always be the truth our job is to amplify the interest and presence we have with other people to ask them questions about how they’re doing to engage in their life to see how they’re doing doesn’t mean we don’t share our own as well but we got to amplify our interest with other people get present with them and then when we depart from any interaction and this is the hardest part no matter what that interaction was to draw satisfaction from it to say you know I went pretty well I know that’s really hard because if you ever been an introvert or you have that style it leans toward being introvert it’s hard to do that because you often leave social interactions and when you think about them you don’t really process them in a positive style or frankly you don’t process them at all because you just go back into yourself without really being with that interaction what you need to do is walk away from interactions having brought your best self to that interaction no matter what is I don’t care was family friend someone who you just meet on the street you bring your best self into that conversation afterward you say I did good Derek I asked him some questions and I shared a little about myself sometimes that’s step one with the people who are in your life ask them some more questions about them themselves their lives and then have a little satisfaction say get a good job with that you know Reed Dale Carnegie’s how to win friends and influence people and I’m not kidding that book really helped me at a very critical time in my life when I was younger so please check that out I would say the second idea is with whoever is in your life if there are people in your life wherever it is try the plus one strategy you’re going to go up to a you know dinner with a buddy maybe it’s your only close friend in the world ask your close friend in the world say why don’t you bring someone a date to dinner who we can just out there we’ll make it a instead of just the two of us we’ll have three at dinner you know and in start introducing one more person into your social interaction asking them questions sharing a little about yourself and as that happens it’s not about you know quantity it’s about quality which is why starting with that conversation engaging with real interest in others sharing yourself with them and being okay with that interaction but now let’s just start amping up one plus if you and your spouse are going out with somebody then ask that couple to bring another couple just get used to enlarging your social sphere a little bit more because you know how it is sometimes you do have a social sphere but you don’t really connect with them you know I mean maybe maybe maybe you’ve got like three people in your life and you’re like you know you like one of them will ask all three to bring somebody to the next thing you do and now the odds are increasing that you’re going to find somebody to connect with because one new person connect with can contain your outlook your mood your life forever one new person can bring in a whole new quality of energy into your life just one but you got to be proactive you can’t wait and sit there oh I hope I hope I hope you got to invite people to stuff you know that’s the key you got to start inviting people to stuff and so that +1 strategy if you’re going to do anything with another person invite another person along with that you’re going to start to see that your social sphere grows and the odds are you’ll find somebody in there to connect with next piece which is so vitally important is to learn to be more explicit about what you need about what you want about what you dream of to actually share that of yourself a lot of us feel lonely because we don’t feel like people understand and the truth is they probably don’t understand and a lot of people understand because we’ve never explicitly communicated we hope that they picked up on our hints we hope that they would give us time and patience to come out of our shell but that’s not a good strategy just hoping a good strategy is expressing communicating honestly sharing with people who you are what you desire what you need what you dream of to learn to verbalize that and if you’re someone saying well you don’t understand I’m an introvert I can’t do that no no no no believe me introverts can do that I’m in look at Susan Cain who wrote the book quiet which was a real manifesto for introverts she was an introvert and she learned that in order to serve others she had to come out of her shell she had to learn public speaking she had to learn to do interviews it doesn’t mean that those were always natural to her or easy to her but sometimes the next level of getting out of our own shell is to realize that by learning to share your own voice with others you make an impact that it’s not about you that’s about service to others that requires it for me I’m here to tell you I learned to communicate because this was not natural to me my first videos were horrible I was awfully awkward and embarrassed by them and it was not easy for me but I just stayed with it because I knew it could make a difference I became more of a person who communicated to people about my voice about what I thought and felt and and believed in the world I know what happened in reciprocation people shared more with me and I started feeling a different level of satisfaction engagement with the conversations because people were now interested in me and I was interested in them because we were actually having authentic communication which is sharing which is vulnerability which is consistent explicit communication not hoping people understand helping them understand last piece to this one which is really important really important that if you do have people around you let’s say you’re married but you feel lonely in your marriage or you have a good friend but you can go out and hang out have a really great time and everything looks good on a service but inside you’re struggling and you don’t feel like that you’re enjoying it or you’re connecting then that last piece is to get honest with yourself and then honest with them honest with yourself why are you dissatisfied why given all these things all these reasons that you have to do feel connected don’t you like what is it and if you don’t know the answer to that let me loop back to the beginning it’s time to get a counselor or a therapist go talk to somebody who can help you draw that out it could be a life coach a business coach an introvert coach whatever it is that you need it’s okay ask for that support say like I don’t know why I don’t connect with people that they’re around me you know but it’s just I don’t know why it happens and sometimes it’s just not the right peer group you know so you need to find that right peer group that could be you know what if you have a hobby go join the local hobby club for that thing it’s dorky as that sounds go to it if there’s an online forum discussing topics of your passion about go in that forum contribute and share if you can get around people who are passionate about the same things you are you’ll start to see like oh you’re not so different and you start to see oh maybe I do have some connection points and often real connection doesn’t come from these singular interactions we have on the internet one post here one comment there real interaction the kind that makes us feel satisfied and engage are typically enduring interactions meaning friendships meaning loving relationships where we communicate more often and more authentically with the people around us now this video is all been about putting a little bit of that responsibility back on your shoulders the world is not going to show up and see a lonely person say let me help you a lonely person has to go I want to engage again it has to be your desire it has to be your drive it has to be a challenge you issue yourself to serve more to share your voice with the world to get out there and to allow yourself to really connect to allow yourself to be satisfied to ask what did I like about that interaction why did that go well gosh I’m doing a good job to cheer yourself on even in the times of darkness you don’t have to be alone you can start getting around more people sharing more of who you are will it be a challenge yes but I know you’re up for it because challenge is so much everything that drives us as human beings and just push yourself a little bit more you deserve to have an incredibly connected meaningful fulfilling life you deserve to have what we call the charge hey guys it’s Brendan did you like this episode if you did you can do three things right now to continue your journey first you can subscribe right here to my channel which I hope you will so I can keep sending you videos on a weekly basis to change your life second you can get my brand new book for free by clicking the link right here and third you can also go to my website sign up for my newsletter so I can send you free offers free products free programs updates on my events new podcasts and everything else that we don’t do on this channel here if you like to do that just go ahead and click any of these buttons you see right here look forward to seeing it on the next video until then go out there every single day of your life live fully love openly and make your difference today.
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pekes infinite waters diving deep once again we’re here in nature breathing in that beautiful product how to be alone without feeling lonely you will never walk alone again can I get a hello there someone wrote in to us saying asking why do they feel alone when they are in the presence of other people and how can they remove that feeling of loneliness they go into work but they can’t connect with anybody at work even certain friends they have they feel lonely around them what can they do let me share with you what’s helped me along my journey because boy I can tell you a lot about them now a lot of us on planet Earth we want to seem like everything is going wonderfully and sometimes it’s not no it’s far from perfect right you go into work everybody’s having a good chit chat but you don’t feel comfortable to relax you feel lonely you feel isolated I get a lot of questions from Indigo’s crystals rainbows the new children of the new generation they say it’s a wonderful gift to have this information this level of awareness but sometimes they feel alone they feel lonely what happened to me now you probably see me always smiling right in front of a camera I’m sharing maybe you’ve had a consultation with me I’m also smiling but when I first started it was a whole nother story I was like a lamb lost in the woods I felt alone why because nobody was talking about becoming your greatest version maybe a handful of people if that so here I was feeling I was talking to nobody plus I had to go to work and I felt like I couldn’t fit in you see in our society we are raised to believe and think that you have to fit in because of that many of us find it very uncomfortable to be in the company of ourselves I can’t stand myself I want to run away from myself I wrote down a long time ago the human being is on the run from itself what happened to me many years ago I would be sitting down and all of these thoughts from nowhere would be coming into my mind I said I don’t want to experience that again okay so I’m gonna talk to a group of friends even if I don’t really resonate with them how many of us are in a relationship right now because we don’t want to be alone what I call a relationship of convenience can I know we’re not gonna get a Hello for that how many of us are just nodding our heads when our friends are talking but we’re not really in the conversation our heart isn’t in there so what did I do I let go of all the resistance I had to being alone changed my life forever now I actually embrace the gift of being alone and I never feel lonely you see there’s a difference between being alone and being isolated being alone is where you reconnect back to the wholeness of who you are you had the great paradox right I had to be alone to find myself to become whole when you are isolated you are separate from your wholeness that is why you can be in the presence of other people but still feel isolated many times I spend about 70% of the day whoa breathing in that beautiful prana baby in nature sometimes I’m alone I’m meditating I’m reconnecting back to the elements so I never feel alone why because I see the plants I reconnect back to the prana I ground myself on planet Earth on Gaia so I’m fully connected but more so because I’ve changed my belief system we are never alone the universal way sends someone what happens when we feel we are lonely when we feel we are alone well it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy why because word is bond so you’ve got to start changing your words what I do what I did a long time ago I still do it I will always meet my reflections and that’s what’s happened when you find yourself in a desert there’s no water around there’s no food around be grateful why because now you can get to know who you are because for a long I’m you’ve had your running shoes on right you’re running trainers on you’ve been trying to get away from yourself now you go to dive deep you got to see certain things about yourself you may not want to see you may not want to take a look at but it’s too bad because now this is where the reintegration takes place what helped me along my journey I actually overcame my panic attacks and my anxiety by surrendering to being alone by not always going in the direction of the crowd but creating my own Trail you have to be super brave to be alone that’s why a lot of us don’t want to be alone I don’t blame you right and you don’t have to we’ll come to that later when I was alone how I let go of that feeling of being lonely I use this as a moment wonderful moment to work on myself I said gosh I’ve got a lot of time on my hands that’s wonderful I’ve got a lot of time to think time is your most valuable asset be thankful if you’ve got a lot of fear training reconnection self acceptance self love all that comes when you take a trip into the forest by yourself what happens okay when you lose your mobile phone it’s a nightmare right you’re having a panic attack and then you find in your pocket don’t worry about it what happens when certain friends aren’t around I have a lot of friends who they work so much all the time right and because of that we don’t have the highest resonance anymore so what happened I reconnected with new friends by sharing myself with the world the more you become a content creator the more you start to share your innate gifts with the world you start attracting your connection your reflections you start finding your community therefore even if you are alone you got a smile like this don’t worry about it because when I go home I’m gonna connect with the most amazing people in the world but you see when we talk of becoming becoming more social that’s what we’re talking about here a lot of us we always waiting for people to come up to us right how many times have you seen someone maybe you’re outside you’re on the beach you’re on the beach you’re in the park you’re walking down the road and you really want to talk to them but you got a belief system that says everybody has to approach me first it’s no wonder you’re gonna feel lonely why not a random act of kindness that is probably one of the greatest ways to not feel alone whenever I’m skating in Venice I always stop skating and I walk down and I always go on talk to the people selling stuff amazing stories to tell they have I’ve also got a few myself right you enter these amazing conversations with so called strangers there are no strangers my friend we are all connected once you realize that secret you will never walk alone again when you have the gratitude consciousness do you know how fortunate you are to be alive can I get a hello yeah yeah but you see many times when we feel lonely it’s because we’re blaming ourselves we don’t appreciate ourselves the more you start to respect yourself and realize how far you’ve come also realize that to work on a dream and a vision you might have to go through the desert to really perfect your craft and in a mastery embrace the gift embrace the gift embrace the gift and you will find your reflections but more so you will surrender to the truth of who you are and you will never feel lonely again we’re in nature just chillaxing have a wonderful day we’re out here infinite waters diving deep once again stay well stay healthy peace you you you.
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