Social Anxiety Dating

The social anxiety dating hub. Helping you turn your life around. Get a markable difference in your social life and overcome shyness within 7 days. How crazy is that?

“Social anxiety is the fear of social situations that involve interaction with other people. You could say social anxiety is the fear and anxiety of being negatively judged and evaluated by other people. It is a pervasive disorder and causes anxiety and fear in most all areas of a person’s life. It is chronic because it does not go away on its own.” – From socialphobia.org

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social anxiety dating


How Can I Manage My Social Anxiety?

Almost everyone gets a little nervous before a first date. Below is a list of several dating tips for social anxiety that you can start to practice today:

Think about dating realistically:

I use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) techniques to help you observe your thoughts and think differently. It is important not to make negative assumptions or to jump to the wrong conclusions. There is a chance that your date just lost his or her cell phone. Also, a few bad dates in a row are not indicative of a lifetime alone.

Think about the right attitude:

Go out on dates to have fun and meet new people. Take dating one step at a time. Instead of thinking about a future potential spouse, focus on how simple a single date usually is. You are just going to meet someone for coffee or lunch. If it works out, great. If it does not, there is a better match out there. Remember that you are a good and important person.

Think about what the worst plausible scenario is:

Almost everyone hates rejection.

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social anxiety dating photoSocial anxiety is a challenging issue, but there is help. I can provide the social anxiety dating help you need to live the life you deserve. Remember that you are a good and important person. And, rejection is part of dating. Get the help you need to overcome social anxiety and meet your match.

have you ever found that when you’re picked on to answer a question in front of a group of people your heart rate immediately goes up well when you walk into a party you immediately feel that sense of nerves and trepidation or when someone tells you that you might have to give a speech or an announcement that you suddenly seize up with fear at the very idea of it if this is the case with you then you’re someone with social anxiety it also means that you’re a human being see the problem with the culture that we live in is that we’re so quick to put labels on people for what they are and of course when you take someone who gets socially anxious and of course people with social anxiety disorder are described as being so fearful of embarrassment so fearful of social situations that they seek to avoid them who among us hasn’t done that at some point by the way as soon as you give that person the label of having social anxiety disorder or social phobia immediately they start to wear that as a badge it becomes who they are and an excuse for everything that they do from that point on I think this is very dangerous I grew up very anxious in social situations and of course I did avoid many situations because I didn’t want to embarrass myself whether it was approaching a girl that I liked or going to a party or giving a speech I avoided situations proactively I don’t think that meant that I had social anxiety disorder I think it meant that I was like everybody else now I’m not saying that social anxiety disorder in the extreme sense doesn’t exist but I think so many of us are so busy identifying with a problem that we lose sight of the human element of it there are actually many of the symptoms of something like this are things that we all feel they connect all of us and there are ways to deal with it so as I grew up I decided that this wasn’t something that I wanted and you may have decided that if you feel nerves in social situations that’s not something that you want either I started working on tips that I couldn’t introduce into my life little ways that I could start to erode my own social anxiety in situations that are unfamiliar situations where we feel like we’re not competent and situations where we focus too much on the full of others by the way don’t ever think that just because you get rid of it on one occasion it won’t come back again in some form I was recently in a situation in Hollywood where I went to a party that was very Seanie it was one of the very scene II hotels and it was very full of a celebrity type weather it was one of these celebrities or real celebrities there was a mixture of the two and I remember walking into that place and feeling that immediate sense of not belonging that immediate sense of being on the outside looking in both being within and without at the same time and watching everyone in this environment and feeling that fear that I felt back when I was a teenager or a kid feeling that come back again in that moment watching all of these people and this feeling that everyone else gets it and I don’t somehow or everyone else knows each other but I don’t I’m not important in this environment I felt so out of my element I’m from London I’m not from this place it was so weird to me that I started to feel socially anxious in that moment now I don’t identify with that anymore I identify with being a human being a human being who sometimes feels anxious and sometimes feel comfy ‘ls comfortable depending on how acclimatized I am to a certain situation and of course to some extent depending on how competent I am in a certain situation there are many things that can affect how anxious we feel let me give you three right now that are really going to help you first tip get familiar with social environments go to the same bar several times in the next couple of weeks you probably would get to know the bartender he’d get to know you by name perhaps you’d get to know the regular faces that went into that bar you’d know where the restaurants were you’d know where the tables were you’d know what time it started to get busy you’d get familiar with that environment that doesn’t just apply to nightspots it also applies to the coffee shop that you go to every morning as well you’ll find that you’ll get more comfortable the more you go to that place when you go to a new environment it can be like the jungle even though it’s safe and you know it’s safe if feels like you’ve found yourself in the middle of the wilderness and you don’t know what to do get familiar with places by the way that also works for situations if public speaking is your fear get familiar with public speaking by doing it as much as you can and doesn’t matter whether it’s in front of two people or 200 people get familiar with that environment second tip start small I just said the public expects speaking example start with one or two people right just start doing it if you find yourself in a party do what I did at this event start small I know that a room of a hundred people is the same of a room the same as a room with one person it’s just scaled up this room is just multiplied but the rules are the same I just need to start small I can start with a simple hello I can talk to the person that’s right next to me or the doorman or the bartender doesn’t matter if they’re male/female what age what shape or size what my intentions are right now my intention is not to get a date it is not to go out and make the best friend I’ve ever made or to develop a whole new social circle my intention is simply to get comfortable with this environment see if you can focus on taking one individual at a time you can see them for who they are an individual I think one of the worst traits of social anxiety is it actually makes us more judgemental it turns us into the person that we don’t want to be in fact it turns us into the very people that we fear the ones who judge the most because when we’re in a fearful state that’s when we start judging other people for example when a guy is in a fearful state and he’s trying to attract women it’s from that fearful state that he labels that woman a bitch because she won’t talk to him or because she looks angry he’s just projecting on to her is from that state that that woman who’s afraid of that guy says he’s arrogant or he’s a pig I don’t like guys like that or we look around and we say everyone here is just stuck up or everyone here is just a celebrity or a wannabe celebrity it’s from that place that we start to get judgmental and it’s one of the worst trays instead see that person as an individual someone who of course despite any obvious flaws that you see actually might have some interesting opinions on the world or might have an interesting history or if he doesn’t have either of those things or she doesn’t have either of those things just could be a fun five minutes of your evening a fun interaction step 3 be generous with your energy so often social anxiety is a particular kind of self indulgence it’s in some ways a particular kind of narcissism you have walk in to a situation thinking that everyone is thinking about you worried about what everyone thinks of you whether you could possibly be liked by everyone whether you could get a date it’s all very me centric it’s all about me instead get generous with your energy I’m going into this room to see how I can make other people feel can I make them feel happy can I make them feel like the outfit that they wore tonight was a great choice that they put themselves together very well rather than go in trying to get something go in trying to give something get generous because as soon as you get generous you’ll be focused outside of yourself instead of being in your own head the whole time so there is three quick tips for overcoming social anxiety get familiar with your environment or your situation start small and get generous with your energy if you combine those three tips with avoiding the trap of identifying with social anxiety instead of identifying with being a human being who obviously gets naturally nervous in certain environments and just has to overcome it if you can do that you’ll gradually start to overcome social anxiety and as you chip away at it you’ll start to realize it’s not how you have to be and how you have to live but something that you can overcome thank you my friends I’ll see you next time by the way some of you I know are already on this program but if you’re not right now I have a program for you that actually helps you overcome these things because I actually get you out into social environments talking to people meeting and attracting new people and it’s a great step by step process to actually overcoming some of these things in pursuit of the guy that you want so I will put up a box right now you can click it go through watch the video and see if that program is right for you take care guys I’ll see you soon.
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